Saturday, December 21, 2013

Dog Show!

I need to apologize for not posting yesterday. I know I probably ruined hundreds of people’s day by not posting. I know how my posts are the most important part of your day besides catching up on what Snooky and Pauly D. and The Situation are up to. Just kidding, of course. Those guys aren’t real…
   Let me tell you about yesterday and why I absolutely had no time to post - and why I am just now posting so late in the day.
   Well, you see, yesterday was the big North Pole Dog Show. I had NO idea what a big deal it was (I’m such an amateur!) Sooo many participants. I arrived early at the event, trying to look professional, and already the arena was filled with dogs and their owners. Mostly smaller breeds, like chihuahuas, dachshunds, yorkies, and miniature pinschers, but there were a few larger breeds too (which will be key to the plot momentarily). One elf came in riding on the back of his Great Dane. That dog was huge!
    Anyway, I got Quarterpockets registered and off to his first event, doggy tricks. He performed playing dead, shaking, and hula hooping with a special miniature hula hoop I made for him in the shop. He was a real crowd pleaser! Let me tell you! Even Santa Claus, who attended the event, commented on how entertaining little Quarterpockets was! Dr. Treacletart, the veterinarian who was there on hand, said that Quarterpockets was his personal favorite. Mintchuckle said she was really impressed by his stage presence. She said he was “a natural.”
    Unfortunately, right before the next event started, an enormous gray cloud moved in, and a blizzard started! (Again - why in the world are we having these events OUTSIDE?! Seriously, I will single-handedly clean up all the mess MYSELF. Well...maybe not “single-handedly” - I’d probably use a broom,) Anyway, a huge gust of wind blew over the main tent and dogs went nuts and scrambled every which way. Then the snow started coming down in buckets and I lost Quarterpockets in the white-out. (One of the hazards of owning a white dog, I guess.) I wasn’t worried, though. He was in his element. The other dogs, however - like the high-maintenance poodles and the shih tzus - I wasn’t too sure about.
   A few of the judges tried to calm everyone down and direct people toward the reindeer stables nearby to salvage the event, but they were having a really hard time getting everyone’s attention. I happened to be near four little chihuahuas that were huddled together, so I took charge and chucked them into an empty stable stall (I think it belonged to Dancer, but they were re-painting the names over the stalls at the time, so I could be wrong…) Then I was able to wrangle a St. Bernard (I’m awesome like that) and get him inside as well. Then I grabbed hold of a pug and was about to throw him into the stall when I realized it was down to only one chihuahua and one St. Bernard (Strange...all three of their collars were still there…) but I was pretty busy, rescuing dogs and all.
   In the end, the blizzard stopped, and most of the dogs returned - including Quarterpockets - to finish the event, with the exception of those three little chihuahuas. Too bad. For some reason Santa Claus told Dr. Treacletart to do a stomach ultrasound or x-ray on that St. Bernard. (Beats me. I’m new to the dog world.)
   Finally, when it was time to announce best of show, first they announced the third place winner: Bonfreckle Dillybar and her  Fiddlejig. Then - you won’t believe this - in second place, Mintchuckle Sweetcheeks and her toy poodle, Daisy! Then, drum roll please...Snicklefritz B. Miffletins III and his arctic fox, Quarterpockets! Woohoo! I was so excited I forgot all about the Elf Olympics tragedy. (Well, I guess I actually didn’t…) I was so happy!


   Mintchuckle was an absolute lady about getting second place to me - er - Quarterpockets. Sooo, I offered to take her out to eat as a consolation prize and she accepted!
   I took her to a little Swedish restaurant called Ookenflugen. We had some delicious smoked salmon crepes and lingonberry pie. It was a BIG success.
   Then this morning, I called up Mintchuckle (darn right I got her number) and we went out for some salted caramel hot chocolate at Starbucks (of course we have Starbucks here - they’re EVERYWHERE.) We talked for hours. Then I went to her family’s Christmas party and met her parents. They were very hospitable. We had a little elf Nativity scene and drank wassail. I just got home, actually. I don’t know guys, this has been a whirl wind weekend! I’m thinking I might just go by Kitzerbox Hoogler’s Jewelry and look at some rings. I’m not kidding! So, I got some thinking to do. 
   Four days until Christmas!
Until next time,
Fritz


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