Sub-Zero Pizza and Diversity Training

   Today was the meeting with Santa Claus about his new pizza parlor. He wants to call it Sub-Zero Pizza. I think it's a great name! As I've mentioned, my main part in this endeavor is the animatronic band. At first he was thinking cute little polar animals, but after the recent yeti attack, he's thinking of having an abominable snowman band called "The Abominables." Similar to other pizza joint animatronic bands, but with more edge.

   I am excited! We have such a pitiful selection of eateries here at the North Pole - mostly Scandinavian. I think Santa was inspired by a recent trip to New York. Here's a picture he showed me from Lombardi's Pizza - the oldest pizzeria in New York City. Yum. Makes me hungry...

    During our meeting, we heard a knock on our door. "Who is it?" Santa asked. "It's Rudolph." Santa rolled his eyes and shook his head. "Come in, " he said. Then Rudolph sauntered in and reported that he had received some hate speech in the stables this afternoon. "And what was that?" Santa asked.
    Apparently, Dancer and Prancer were singing, "Ruuuudolph! You don't have to put on the red light!" Rudolph found this very offense, for obvious reasons. "I'm sorry, Rudolph. That was completely insensitive and not conducive to a team atmosphere and will not be tolerated," Santa said in what sounded like a rehearsed speech. Rudolph nodded and, with some difficulty, opened the door with his antlers and left. Then Santa whispered to me, "I am mandated to say that."
   See, after the original incident when Rudolph became the lead reindeer, the teasing apparently didn't stop and Santa had to institute diversity training and policies to keep things fair within the reindeer herd. Some of the reindeer just will not comply - even after all these years and lawsuits. I have the sneaking suspicion that everyone will have to attend a special diversity training session very soon. Things would be so much easier if people would just be nice to each other! Sheesh!
   Well, we decided to start the bulk of the work just after Christmas. If I have spare time, I'll draw up some basic designs beforehand, but Santa doesn't want me to get distracted. I'm really excited, though! I don't know if I can wait! And I can't wait to get some pizza up here. The last time I had pizza was when Santa brought some home early Christmas morning after doing his deliveries. Apparently some kid left pizza out for him instead of cookies. It was cold and rock hard, but after some warming up by the fire, it tasted pretty good. I bet you humans eat it all the time down there in the subarctic.
   Well, that's all for now. 9 days until the big day! Make sure you're on the nice list!
Peace out,
Fritz